As Splicer continues to hemhorrage money
Rode my new motorcycle even farther today… all the way to Daly City. I actually toyed with the idea of going all the way to Pacifica, but the way I know to get there involves a real highway portion of Route 1, and I’m not quite comfortable enough on the bike (having ridden on the streets less than two days) for the freeway. Route 35 was scary enough because the wind was pretty high. Getting pushed around by crosswinds at 55mph is… well, I can see why people choose to own bigger, heavier bikes.
The point of the trip was to visit the Red Wing Store in Daly City, and I didn’t need to go all the way to Pacifica for that (duh). I wanted to get «Tech-Toe» boots, which are like steeltoes, but with some kind of lightweight polycarbonate instead of steel. They don’t make any boots as tall as I want for riding with Tech-Toe, so I gave up on them. Instead I found the «Fire Boot», which looks like this:
…except with a zipper insert that’s hard to explain but involves two laces and a complicated lacing pattern (complete with instruction manual and special pull-tool). Once in place (as they are now) the boots come on and off with a zipper. The nice thing is that if I get sick of having zippered boots, I can take the insert out and lace the boots normally (as they are in the picture.)
They are steel-toed boots and also steel-soled in case someone tries to nailgun my feet from beneath. ANSI-rated of course.
The Red Wing salesman said he sells a lot of that model to EMTs. I figured they should be good enough for me, but also took it with a grain of salt. I mean, the salesman could be saying anything and I’d never know the difference. Later on in the day however, I saw my friend Niko, who actually is an EMT. She said that mine were exactly the boots she wants, except that Red Wing doesn’t make them in women’s sizes and that the smallest men’s size they make is too big for her. So I’m gratified that I’ve graduated from boots worn by punk rock losers to boots preferred by actual real-life superheroes.
Side note to the people at the Red Wing Shoe Company: hey, make the Fire Boot in women’s sizes! A chick EMT might save your life someday, and then won’t you feel dumb for not making the best boot for her? I’m just sayin’.
Many of the Red Wings on display in the store had little U.S. flag tags on the laces. I asked whether some were made in the U.S. and some made elsewhere, fearing that Red Wing had gone the way of Converse, sending their manufacturing overseas. Nope, just that the floor staff only has so much time to unlace display shoes and put miniature U.S. flags on them. So what the hell, I figure. I’m pretty pleased to have sent my money to a domestic company (even if I didn’t do so when I bought my bike). My new boots have tacky little U.S. flags on them, and the reverse side says «Red Wing Shoe Company». Sweet.
I notice that I have a little fear that wearing a representation of a U.S. flag might gain me some scorn from the local politically-correctness nazis. But I comfort myself by remembering that if I get my ass kicked by a hippie while I’m wearing steel-toed boots, I deserve the beating.
Anyway, just as I was leaving the Red Wing Store, it started pouring down rain. It’s good that I get to learn to ride in the rain I guess, but not so good that I get to learn what it’s like to get my jeans soaked through. Ugh. So add riding pants to the list of pricey accessories I should get soon.
At least I have a mostly appropriate jacket. For over a decade people have been asking me if I ride a motorcycle when I wear my black leather jacket. Now I no longer have to tell them I’m just a poser.
Well, only because it’s disrespectful
[quote=splicer]I notice that I have a little fear that wearing a representation of a U.S. flag might gain me some scorn from the local politically-correctness nazis.[/quote]
Well, only because it’s disrespectful to the flag.
From the U.S. Flag Code:
> “The flag represents a living country and is itself considered a living thing. Therefore, the lapel flag pin being a replica, should be worn on the left lapel near the heart.”
> “The flag should never be used as wearing apparel, bedding, or drapery…The flag should never be fastened, displayed, used, or stored in such a manner as to permit it to be easily torn, soiled, or damaged in any way…The flag should never be used for advertising purposes in any manner whatsoever. It should not be embroidered on such articles as cushions or handkerchiefs and the like, printed or otherwise impressed on paper napkins or boxes or anything that is designed for temporary use and discard…No part of the flag should ever be used as a costume or athletic uniform. However, a flag patch may be affixed to the uniform of military personnel, firemen, policemen, and members of patriotic organizations.”
http://www.usflag.org/us.code36.html
Well yes, the flag code
Well yes, the flag code makes a clear distinction between representations or replicas of the flag and actual flags. Otherwise you’d never be able to print photographs of public buildings that have flagpoles, now would you? I don’t think that any of the varieties of illustrations of flags on flagpoles that go into “made in the USA” tags have been accused of violating the flag code.
Anyhow, no, I was thinking more of the little Berkeleyite fuxx0rs who already think I’m a fascist for believing that Bush is only the antichrist, not something worse.
Well yes, the flag code
[quote=splicer]Well yes, the flag code makes a clear distinction between representations or replicas of the flag and actual flags.[/quote]
No, no it doesn’t. Read that again — *because* it’s a replica of the flag, it must be treated with respect and worn over the heart.
> “The words ‘flag, standard, colors, or ensign’, as used herein, shall include any flag, standard, colors, ensign, or any picture or representation of either, or of any part or parts of either, made of any substance or represented on any substance, of any size evidently purporting to be either of said flag, standard, colors, or ensign of the United States of America or a picture or a representation of either, upon which shall be shown the colors, the stars and the stripes, in any number of either thereof, or of any part or parts of either, by which the average person seeing the same without deliberation may believe the same to represent the flag, colors, standard, or ensign of the United States of America.”
[quote=splicer]I don’t think that any of the varieties of illustrations of flags on flagpoles that go into “made in the USA” tags have been accused of violating the flag code.[/quote]
They do. “The flag should never be used for advertising purposes in any
manner whatsoever.” Fourth of July picnic supplies — paper napkins, paper plates, etc printed with the stars and stripes — also violate the flag code: “It should not be embroidered on such articles as cushions or handkerchiefs and the like, printed or otherwise impressed on paper napkins or boxes or anything that is designed for temporary use and discard.” The flag code is routinely and flagrantly violated, but it clearly says that any representation of the flag should be treated with the same respect as the flag itself.
Wearing the flag on your feet is, in my opinion, disrespectful. But then I’m kind of a flag extremist.
Fuck. Now I gotta delace the
Fuck. Now I gotta delace the damn things again. I guess I’d rather have the tags with the Red Wing logo anyhow. Please don’t turn me in until I can make another trip to Daly City, OK?
PS somebody better fink out that Captain America guy. Who does he think he is carrying that shield around?
PPS At least three pictures of flags at http://www.whitehouse.gov/ probably Andrew Jackson’s fault. Fucker.
PPPS Look at the back of the Twenty Dollar bill!!!!!1! And WHO IS ON THE FRONT??? AHA!!!!
Yep, Cap is definitely in
Yep, Cap is definitely in violation. “No part of the flag should ever be used as a costume.”
I bet that’s Andrew
I bet that’s Andrew Jackson’s fault too, but I just can’t prove it yet.
For real “patriots”, the
For real “patriots”, the good thing about the flag code is that it’s a great tool for selective enforcement. Bust the hippies for doing the same thing your fellow patriots do.
The hippies tend to avoid
The hippies tend to avoid flags altogether, unless they’ve got a marijuana leaf on them.
I dream sometimes of going around giving Flag Code citations to every hotel and bank that leaves the flag up (unilluminated) at night; every house with a frayed and tattered flag out front; every car with a flag tied to its antenna; every store that leaves the flag flying in the rain…It’s sort of an obsession.