Mmm, rice

There are 23 work­ing days in Octo­ber. Eleven have passed, and twelve remain. That means that tomor­row is “hump day” for the month. Of course, I have just two more days in the office and then I get two entire days off. it’s this strange thing called a “week­end” that was entire­ly mean­ing­less to me as a con­sul­tant, but now has become a pre­cious lit­tle win­dow to freedom.

Also, here’s a news flash: the win­ner of the Mis­ter Unre­li­able con­test for the past twen­ty years run­ning has a 100% on-time record in his new employ­ment. OK, so it’s not like a big deal for most peo­ple to show up by 9am every day, even for peri­ods longer than eleven days. Still, it’s a nice sign of progress and proof that it is in fact pos­si­ble for me to be on-time regularly.

Twice I’ve cut it close — today I walked in the door of my office at 8:58am — but both times I’ve cut it so close were days that I worked out at the gym before work. So tonight I’m turn­ing my alarm clocks back anoth­er 20 min­utes to try to give me more lee­way so that I can work out in the morning.

This is impor­tant because even if I’m turn­ing into Mis­ter Reli­a­bil­i­ty, I’m also turn­ing into Mis­ter Blimp. This morn­ing’s weigh-in creaked in at 195lbs. Which means that I’ve put back on forty of the fifty pounds I lost two years ago. I am, as they say, such a big fat fuck that when I walk down the street peo­ple say, “God DAMN that guy’s a BIG FAT FUCK.”

Ah well, got­ta run. It’s ten min­utes past my bed­time already, and I haven’t changed my bed­time to reflect the ear­li­er wake­up call. Must take rice off the stove and get some sleep.